Chachi Milk

Photo of the Moment

2010-10-25T13:47:00.002-05:00

It's Fall. We're still here. Just busy. Here's a great one of Pete (with cousin John in the background). Look for more soon...

It's School Time

2010-09-26T20:16:00.007-05:00

The first day of school still feels so big, doesn't it? Rose and I actually felt kind of nervous this year. It was a big one - Vincent in full day kindergarten, riding the bus, wearing a uniform. It feels so much older than a 5 year old. And Peter's first day of Pre-K. His first time out of the house alone, without his brother. Ever.

Turns out, they were ready.

The duo on Vincent's first day, ready to take on the world.

Determined. Marching toward the bus stop. The wind at his back. Jedis on his back.

This one is a killer. We weren't going to be those parents taking a picture of their kid on the bus. We weren't until Bus Driver Carol said, "If you have a camera, go ahead and take a picture." So I couldn't resist. His face is amazing. 50% terror, 50% determination. He had some bus buddies to help him through it. He's loved it ever since.

Big Pete, ready to go. He was all for it. A few separation-induced tears when he stepped into the classroom, but after some curt prompting by his teacher ("Go. Just go. He'll be fine.") he did great.

"Cheeese. Ok, great. Now let's go to school, Mom. You and me. You're staying, right? Can you be the teacher? C'mon - it'll be fun. We get juice and crackers. And we have circle time. C'mon, Mom...."

Sweet Tooth

2010-09-20T22:37:00.004-05:00

I know I owe you all some great first week of school photos. I'll get to them. For now though, you have to check this out. Take 4:32 out of your day. It's a song the boys have been loving since the first time I played it for them. "Put on the candy bar song" they say. While it's not written for kids, I've found that very early country or Texas swing songs or songs inspired by them, are great for the boys. There's a bounce and a clarity they love. David Rawlings and Gillian Welch are maybe the best purveyors of that sound right now.

For my musician friends and music appreciators, check out the guitar solo at the 1:30 mark. It's truly astonishing. For you lyric-centric folks, don't listen to the entire metaphor, or you'll suss out pretty quickly that it's a reference to a different kind of sweet tooth, but it's buried so deeply that the kids won't know until they're about 13 or so.

Final note - the crowd in this video might be the best audience in the history of audiences. The hang onto every. single. word. They laugh at the jokes, clap for the solo. They get it. Even though the video cuts out after awhile, this is the best version on YouTube for that reason.

So put on the candy bar song. You deserve it.

So Many Firsts

2010-09-11T19:37:00.002-05:00

This is a big week of firsts for the boys, starting with Vincent's first official, organized, uniformed, instructional, competition-oriented soccer game. He's on The Black Team, which no matter which way you cut it, is badass.
Water break. Fighting fatigue, having just finished running for 90 minutes straight.

Action shot, taking the ball up. He didn't get a chance to score much but of the 10 kids on the field, only 3 really did. The rest floated with the pack.

It was still awesome. Go Team Black. Onward to History.

Milkzen

2010-09-09T17:23:00.000-05:00

"Mom! Peter just ate a chocolate chip cookie then put on deodorant!"

-Vincent

Try a Lot of Tenderness

2010-09-06T20:27:00.003-05:00

I realize that this doesn't seem fair. It's pure cuteness overload. You may think I set this shot up. Hired a kitten. Trained Peter to pet it just so. Feed it grass.

Nope. It's all real.

We were at one of our haunts - Milky Way Farms in Chester Springs - when the little thing popped out of nowhere and started playing with us. The boys were (fairly) gentle when reminded of its fragility, and the kitten was startlingly tolerant of two boys wanting to hang out with it. And no we did not take it home. It belonged there.

We did give it a couple of cool names, though. "Ice Cream" - since we were about to go get some, and "Vincentpetercarolinejohnjoseph" - after the boys and their immediate cousins.

So take it all in. It was a serendipitous moment of blinding cuteness that may never happen again.

Milkzen

2010-09-02T20:07:00.001-05:00

Today's Milkzen:
"No Dad. I was gonna jump over your face."

-Peter

Summer Stories Vol., 2: Paci Separation

2010-08-30T19:52:00.005-05:00

Earlier this summer I posted about Blankie & Paci for the first time. They have always been inextricably linked to Our Man Pete. Since he turned 3, we've been discussing life without Paci and how we get there. After much deliberation, we found a solution.

We cut off its head.

After hearing several friends and family members discuss their techniques, this one kept bubbling to the surface. It basically involves having your child help you cut the chewy part of the pacifier off, leaving the handle intact. The child involvement is critical to buy-in. Once that part is gone, so is the attachment to the paci. They have the physical piece, but not the full satisfaction, allowing for easier detachment. It's kind of like smokeless cigarettes. You get the stimulation without the addiction.

Did it work, though? To an extent, yes. There were a few nights on edge at first. A few sad moments, but nothing like what we were dealing with prior when we'd take the real thing away for large portions of the day. Without the true satisfaction he adjusted.

That doesn't mean he doesn't still carry around the relic. He takes it to bed with him along with Blankie. He just holds it as a remembrance of the golden days. Maybe he dreams of the times they used to share. Hey - we're cool with it still being around since it's no longer dangling from his lips several hours of the day.

We're impressed. The kid basically went cold turkey.

Ok, room temp turkey. Way to go, Pete.

Milkzen

2010-08-17T19:46:00.000-05:00

Many of you already know how random kids can be. It's one of my favorite things about being a Dad. It seems that one or both of the boys pull a thought from the ether and put it out there for the world to hear. I've decided to start a new feature where I capture the best ones that I can remember and share them. Let's see how long I can keep it up for. And by all means, feel free to contribute your own.

Soo....

Tonight, while resting in the dark with the boys for a few minutes before I left their bedroom, Pete creeps within centimeters of my face, looks me in the eye and whispers deliberately, "Daaaaaaaad? Whyyy does Grampa sleep...uuuummmm...with a pillow over his eyes?"

I reply, "So the light in the morning doesn't bother him."

Pete: "Oh."

Summer Stories, Vol. 1

2010-08-11T20:19:00.015-05:00

Let's go back and revisit the summer, shall we? Let's start with our early July trip to Vermont, where we accomplished quite a bit, actually. Chocolate factories, driving our car onto a boat, hot air balloon festivals, stray cats we almost kept, naked Slip N' Slide rides (the kids, sickos), one lost appendix (sorry your trip wasn't so great, Joe) and much, much more. Here are the highlights with my smart-assed comments. Go Green Mountain State!

The greatest hikers that ever lived. This was either just before or just after our 2.2 mile trek on the Long Trail South. Both boys did pretty great considering the rocky, muddy terrain. Oh, and get this, they weren't even the youngest in our group. That honor goes to their cousin John, who was also a beast. We weren't messing around.

The family shot at the top. And yeah, behind us is a straight drop (it's not as close to us as it looks in this photo). Sooo...we didn't stay up there too long. But man is it amazing to take in.

Your standard green grass freedom runners shot. Am I getting predictable?

The Lake Champlain Chocolate Factory. In all honesty, it's not the greatest tour in the world (one room behind glass, people) but I can't say much considering I missed most of it while on a conference call. I'm a jerk. But hey, it's chocolate. And it's near a beautiful lake. So everybody wins.

Pete and John making good use of that clean well water. They took turns running and jumping into the freezing pool, cracking each other up.

Slip N' Slide action shot. And I know it looks like Pete's head is about to snap off but I guarantee you, this was fun. And no whiplash to speak of. What you see behind yours truly is a stark naked Vincent dashing for his next turn.

The tractor ride back from a terrifically hot Shelburne Farms trip with Nonna. Note that the "sweat" you see pictured here has been enhanced by several dunks under the handwashing fountain. You know how we do.

Vincent the Serious, Shelburne style.

I'm on a boat! My wonderful wife taking in the sights on a ferry ride from VT to NY.

We're at a hot air balloon festival! Don't take pictures of us, Dad! Take pictures of the numerous amazing hot air balloons all taking off simultaneously! Do it! Do it!

That's much better, isn't it? And this doesn't begin to do it justice.

And still time for a quick arm painting at the festival. Pete wanted a pink cat, Vincent a yellow.

The crew. John, Joe, Vincent and Pete. Look at little Joe holdin' it down in the middle. They were boys all week long - playing, running, scheming, battling, crying and ultimately, scheming for the future...

More summer moments to come...

Sometimes You're the Windshield...

2010-08-09T16:56:00.003-05:00

I know, I know. It's been awhile. I've actually missed the heck out of blogging. No excuses. Let's just have at it.

I'll start back with an observation that's grown more keen over the past year or so. The hero/villain aspect of parenting. It's amazing how quickly we go from the ones they're coming to for help putting the stormtrooper's head back on to the one they don't want anything to do with. Let's give some examples:

Me home from work, walking in the door: Hey guys! How was your day?!
Pete: GO AWAY! GO BACK TO WORK!
Me: Um. Ok.

or

Vincent or Pete: I WANT TO SIT NEXT TO MOM-MOM!
Me: Ok - that's fine. But we have to figure it out because not everyone can sit next to her.
Pete: I don't lllwwwike you!
Me: Um - how'd we get here?

And so on. After a while you chalk it up to them being kids and it rolls right off. And it seems much more pronounced with Pete due to the extreme ferocity with which he approaches everything in life. Instead of, "Oh man. I was having fun with Vincent and Chief. Now Daddy's home and we have to get baths and hit the sack." It becomes, "NO! GO AWAY!"

Then one minute later it's all hugs and high-fives again. I'd actually like to play some Freaky Friday and try that out myself one day. "THIS BAGEL IS TERRIBLE!!! AAAAHHHHH!.....oh wait. It's fine. I wiped some of the cream cheese off...(whistling) doo dooodoooo."

Stay tuned for some summer catching up. Long haired kids, giant vegetable gardens, trips to different states. Let's do this thing.

Blankiepaci

2010-06-22T22:08:00.000-05:00

How I haven't written about these two pillars of our family life yet, I don't know. Blankie and Paci. Otherwise known as "Blankiepaci." They've nearly been as big a part of our family as our family itself over the past three years.

Immediately upon arriving on Earth, Peter developed a fierce attachment to both. For a while, they went with him everywhere. Now they're pretty much relegated to naptime and bedtime. Blankie is given a bit more leeway than Paci since, well, Paci should really be moseying on by this point. We've given him a reprieve. Pretty soon he'll be given away to the boys' new cousin, Joseph (lucky you, Joseph!) and the dependence will cease - just like that, right? Isn't that how it works?

Blankie can stay around forever. I mean, it's getting crazy ragged at this point but it keeps hanging in there. Pete has even taken to brushing it's loose threads every so softly across his formidable cheeks for comfort. How can we take that away?

So world, meet B&P. The fellas behind the scenes holding up one of our lead characters - until the fateful day when the safety net is pulled back and he's left on his own to swing across the stage.

Ok wait. How did I get here? No more blogging late at night anymore. I need my Paci.

Summer's First Harvest

2010-06-19T10:03:00.000-05:00

Our first homegrown produce! It worked! The time and work paid off! We get to eat....oh....it's lettuce. Oh well. The exotic zucchini and Swiss Chard will be ready soon. For now, let's pop this onto some tacos and raise a toast to sustainability! And lettuce!

Humanity

2010-06-15T21:31:00.002-05:00

Ok, so I know over 18,000,000 people have seen this, but it's worth seeing again. The PS22 Chorus is a group of 5th graders at a public school in Staten Island that have had their renditions of pop songs displayed for all to see on the ol' internets. Normally, this would seem a little exploitative. But then you watch it and you get it. These kids are not messing around. They've had this amazing environment created for them where they're completely unafraid. No fear of embarrasment or ridicule. They're singing (and sometimes dancing) their hearts out and not giving a lick.

My good buddy Jason introduced me to this (I'm #18,000,001) after saying, "With all the terrible s**t in the world, this may have just restored my faith in humanity." I totally agree.

It reminds me of the Langley Schools Music Project that my friend Scott introduced me to years ago. This is basically the digital age version of that. Where the Langley stuff stayed obscure save for a few music geeks passing it along over time, the PS22 Chorus blew up with the help of YouTube. I think there's value in both.

For now, enjoy their version of Phoenix's "Lisztomania" - one of the best songs from one of my favorite records in a long time.

And if you've seen it all before, good for you. Watch it again.

Self Portrait

2010-06-05T09:33:00.000-05:00

Photo of the Moment. Self portrait on the bus ride home from a school trip to the Norristown Zoo.

Little Bear: Zen or Evil?

2010-06-02T05:00:00.000-05:00

What is it about this little Canadian fella? He's long been a TV staple in our house. At first, it went against our young, hipster parent credo. It wasn't oddball enough. Or terribly fun. I mean, it's just about a little bear who lives with his Mother Bear and Father Bear (who always wears a 3 piece suit with pocket watch, even while fishing) and plays with his friends, aptly named Duck, Owl, Cat, etc. He has little adventures through the wilderness but never encounters any real danger or challenge.

He just...is.

Vincent has always loved it. No matter how crazy the day, we could always put an episode on (divided into three, eight minute vignettes) and eight minutes later, he's totally mellowed out, breathing deeply and ready for bed.

Peter didn't take to it at first but he didn't really take to any TV. It wasn't until about 6 or 8 months ago that the same thing started happening to him. Same blank stare. Same zen-like trance.

There are times it happens to Rosalie and I, too. Originally, I chalked it up to the pastoral, classical soundtrack. Not to mention, we were usually watching it around 8pm when we'd both be ready for an evening nap.

But I think there's something more to it. I think the creators have something going on. Some kind of bad Juju disguised as zen. Pretty soon, we'll all be enveloped in one of Little Bear's adventures, watching him scamper about through the woods and BAM, there are paratroopers breaking through our windows, ET-style.

What are they after? I dunno. Haven't thought that far ahead yet. I just know something's up. A little bear told me.

Open Road

2010-05-30T09:28:00.003-05:00

Nothin' like an early morning ride on a long weekend. Happy Summer, friends.

The Flying Dutchmen

2010-05-27T08:42:00.001-05:00

The past month also saw us take a trip out to Dutch Wonderland for Pete's Birthday. I gotta say, for an amusement park that sits right on a fairly major roadway in Lancaster, PA, this place has it together. It's clean, well maintained, appropriately staffed and they even offer "healthier" food choices. At an amusement park. In Lancaster. The boys didn't care about any of that though. They just concentrated on trying the place out.

They loved her. Like, gaga love. As in wanted to smooch. Not Lady.

"LOOK AT US! WE'RE IN....oh....it's a pretzel." What you can't see is a little sign to the right of this that said, "Please don't climb on the pretzel."

Breaking for lunch in the sequestered Lunch Bringers area near the monorail station. Major confession here. What you see Pete drinking is the first ever parent-sanctioned cola beverage. They were running really low on energy and we had lots more playing to do. So we did what any smart parent would do - we let them share a Pepsi. Sure, we were kind of guilty but I gotta say, it made the rest of the afternoon amazing. And who cares, it's not like there's any scientific proof that soda is bad, right?

They went on some really exciting rides that they talked about for days after. This wasn't one of them. As evidenced by their expressions. We don't have footage of the Log Flume, Giant Slide or the Kids' Coaster since we were all enjoying them too much to snap a shot.

Sadly, this was taken early in the day. What is it about this time in your life that makes you look tired a lot. Oh yeah - I remember now. Oh well, that's what Pepsi's for. Big ups to the Disutch Wondizzle. We'll be back for more.

Growth Opportunities

2010-05-23T20:05:00.005-05:00

I could offer you multiple excuses as to why we've been absent for so long. Work excuses. Home excuses. Travel excuses. They'd be boring, though. And none would make me a better blogger. So I won't bother. Instead, let's focus on what's happened over the past month, and what's happening at the moment. Because there's a lot. Including, some positive growth opportunities on the home front, in the form of our first vegetable garden.

As all good ideas start in this house, this came from Rose. We've been frequenting farmers' markets through the spring and summer months for the past couple of years now. So much that we figured, let's take a chunk of our backyard and cultivate the shit out of it in order to grow our own healthy habits. Done.

But first, we had to get through the rocks. Hundreds of them. Hundreds and hundreds. With each shovel into the dirt, we'd hit two or three. We flexed muscles pulling them out of the dirt. We gave them to the boys to throw. We made a rock border around one of our flower beds (reuse, recycle, re....whatever). And we still have more.

All in all, it's going to be pretty awesome. Rose planted dozens of little seedlings and patiently and painstakingly cared for them until they started sprouting. Swiss chard, eggplant, peppers, tomatoes, beets, lettuce, basil, zucchini & string beans. Oh, and an awesome blueberry plant we had to try out. So look out for a vegetable feast coming your way soon. Or kind of soon. Or however long this stuff takes to grow. I don't know, I just dig.

The Lip Whistler

2010-04-28T20:35:00.000-05:00

What? These are my real lips. And yes, they whistle. What of it?

Three Years

2010-04-25T08:25:00.000-05:00

As all parents say, it's hard to believe our child is another year older. But alas, Pete is three today. We had his party a couple of weeks ago, so I figured I'd share some highlights to commemorate the smiliest, loudest, funniest (that's a shared title) kid around.

Happy Birthday, kid.

"Ok, Dad. I'll show you my pretzel. If it'll make you happy that you have a good shot for Chachi Milk. You got it."

With Auntie Kate, eyeing up Caroline's drink even though he most likely has the exact same thing.

One of the rare, shy moments so far in his three years. "Wait - I love cake and all but I really don't need thirty people singing, clapping, staring and waiting for me to make this fire go away."

Before the wreckage.

Photo of the Moment

2010-04-23T20:18:00.000-05:00

Easter Sunday. Two college professors preparing for a morning on the town. Calling upon the author to explain his/her opinion on the Ressurrection, the importance of lillies and just why marshmallow Peeps are so delicious.

Guessing Game

2010-04-21T20:10:00.003-05:00

While managing bedtime tonight, I told Pete that we'd be taking him someplace special for his third birthday this weekend. It's still a secret but he wanted to guess, so I let him.

Guess #1: "Milky Way Farm?"

Good guess, but no. Too routine for us.

Guess #2...

"Chick-Fil-A?"

Nope. But awesome nonetheless.

God I love these kids.

Itchy & Scratchy

2010-04-01T22:04:00.000-05:00

As parents, we have to tread carefully with changes in personal appearance. Our kids' images of us are kind of fixed. They're comfortable knowing that Mommy and Daddy look like Mommy and Daddy. Get a wonky haircut, braces or a face tattoo and it throws it all off.

With that in mind, I grew a beard. Aaaand it's part of a contest.

I know. I know.

At least it's work-related, right? 18 of us are doing it and I stand a pretty good chance in the color category for my ginger-hued whiskers. Still - it wasn't an easy sell. It kind of went like this:

Me: "Hey guys, should I grow a beard?"

V&P: (unison) "No."

Me: "Why not?"

V: "Because."

Me: "Because why?"

V: "It'll be scratchy."
P: (1 second later) "It'll be scratchy."

Me: (hoping, reaching) "Maybe I'll look like Obi-Wan!!"

V: (pause) "No."

Me: "You don't think so?"

V: "It'll be scratchy."

Lesson learned. Don't mess with what you look like. At least a beard happens gradually. They'll be able to track its progress daily, along with its scratchiness. And I look forward to their feedback. I figured the more I hammer home the Star Wars connection, the better my chances are.

These padawans will learn yet.

A Visit with the E.B.

2010-03-30T21:23:00.004-05:00

We had no intention of seeing this guy this year. Just wasn't in the cards. We happened to be at the mall running some errands when we kind of stumbled upon him. Both boys wanted to get their picture taken and there were zero kids in line. Zero.

And the photo is awesome. Neither kid is dressed for the occasion. No white jackets or purple suspenders. No slicked hair. What you see is what you get, Easter Bunny. Incredibles t-shirt, rumpled collar, kind of messy hair.

It's like, whatever, you know?

The expressions kill me. Both have that, "Check me out Mom & Dad. Here I am." pride about them. Even our furry, carrot-eating, colored egg-distributing friend is wearing a surprised face.

And it's no coincidence that Vincent isn't sitting on the dude's lap. That's where he drew the line. He's much better with gloves than he used to be but let's be serious here. He quickly shrugged off the request with a curt, "No."

If it had been planned, we would not have captured this. Too much anticipation would've done us all in. So thanks, Easter Bunny. For being at the right place at the right time.

Cousins

2010-03-25T20:26:00.000-05:00

These kids have badass cousins. No gettin' around it. Our buddy John in Long Island and young Lady Caroline (pictured). They were here for an afternoon of havoc and fun with Mom-Mom and Auntie Maria and stopped long enough to let the paparazzi snap a few. (Ed. note: What is it about these photo strips that I love? Is it that we get 3 or 4 quick, imperfect moments? Yeah - that's probably it. No more questioning needed.) So back to cousins. These kids can't get enough of each other. If Caroline and John lived on our street, they'd all play together for 10 hours straight, crash, and start all over again. I say we start a gang. Or a tribe. Get them a cool name and some jackets. A secret language and theme song.

When you're a Brett, you're a Brett...

Ok. That's enough.

Getting Organized

2010-03-22T19:59:00.004-05:00

Yep. Pete started soccer a couple of weeks back. Not unlike another kid we all know and love. We weren't sure how he would do, quite honestly. I mean, it's no secret the kid's got...um...energy to spare. On top of that, it's a 3-year-olds class and in case you haven't guessed by the lack of birthday posts recently, Pete's birthday is still a month away. Rosalie begged him into the class at our local YMCA.

We knew he'd be able to hold his own physically. It's the listening to directions part that had us a bit worried. I mean - let's be serious here. He's a timeout champ coming off the longest, coldest winter in recent memory. He's red'ta go.

And go he did. Other than a little help from me, he did everything that was asked of him. Running from line to line. Trying to battle the natural inclination to kick the hell out of the ball (remember - they're 3) by redirecting the energy into "little kicks." Trapping. Stretching. Slide tackling. Ok, I made the last one up, but you get it. HE LISTENED!

We've gone back twice since and his audience keeps growing. He walks into the place and the 4 year old girls want his autograph. He saunters into the playroom, throws down his hoodie, grabs a juice box and holds court.

"Yeah. I play soccer. What of it?"

Go Pete.

15-Day Disabled List

2010-03-04T18:23:00.012-05:00

Over the past couple of weeks, the managers of Team Chachi have fallen victim to a series of unfortunate events. Some inflicted by our beloved children, some self-inflicted, all painful (but recoverable!). I'm not one to use this forum to complain, so I won't. Rather, I'll just provide you with the sheer zaniness of it all.

Injury #1: Whiplash (or, Watch Out for That Oncoming Head!)
No, it wasn't a car accident. It was our younger son. Rosalie was leaning over the tub, washing his hair when he executed one of his customary, yet unintentionally violent motions and quickly raised his head up, smashing Rose between the eyes. The blow was so hard that it forced her head back and something approximating an "Muuhnnghph" came from her mouth. She was hurt. I mean - a full on helmet-to-helmet with my wife taking the brunt. A knot formed immediately - on her head, not Pete's. He was fine. Then for the next few days, she was experiencing odd neck pain. And not the standard neck pain a mother of two feels. She definitely wasn't concussed but things wasn't right. So after doing her research, Rose self-diagnosed whiplash. Take a peek at the symptoms and tell me she didn't hit the nail on the..erm...head (that was terrible).

Injury #2: Finger Avulsion (or, Yes, We Still Ate the Eggplant.)
Another injury to my bride. I won't go into the gory details other than to say that she cut a sizeable chunk of the tip of her finger off with a mandoline. Yep. Let me give you a minute to wince. She was slicing eggplant and like seasoned chef she is, was being badass and decided not to use the accompanying guard.

I was outside cleaning out the minivan when she calmly walked out, found me and said, "I may need you take me to the hospital. I think I sliced the tip of my finger off."

We both forced calmness in order to protect our sons' sensibilities but the scene itself wasn't terribly gruesome ("Um. For you it wasn't." - Rosalie). She had it wrapped up, Peter was napping and we explained to Vincent that everything was ok. After consulting with Nan, our chief RN, we headed on over the emergency room with the chunk in a bag of ice and milk. In my pocket.

Four hours, some gelfoam and a hefty bandage later and she was good to go. It's looking much better now and really, everyone says this but - it could've been much worse considering the affect a mandoline could have on one's digits.

Injury #3: Corneal Abrasion (or Time to Trim Your Nails, Kid.)
Finally, I got into the act. One night, I was placing Peter back in his bed after he had wandered into our room. He laid down, then instantly rolled over violently, with his arms outstretched and caught me right on my left eyeball. A perfect poke. I knew immediately that this wasn't your run-of-the-mill, wait for 5 minutes and its gone job. He got me good.

So as he went back to sleep, I laid down in his bed, gripping my eye, wondering what to do. I figured it might help to keep it closed, so I just fell asleep again in his bed for a few hours hoping it would heal by the morning.

Turns out corneal abrasions don't quite heal that quickly. I thought I could tough it out. I showered, shaved, changed and got ready to head out to catch my train and realized I had done all of that without the use of my left eye. That was it. I called the eye doctor, got it checked out and after a few days of drops, I was fully functional again.

The human body sure is amazing, isn't it? We've been lucky it's been us tough-assed adults and not our chilluns getting hurt. Their time will come I'm guessing.

For now - we'll start using the guard.

Two Great Tastes

2010-02-16T18:04:00.002-05:00

I'm traveling for work at the moment so all of my anecdotes are second hand. That doesn't make them any less great. Here's one for you:

Today, Peter poured half a jug of (pure) maple syrup (expensive) into a container of Nesquik.

My poor wife was outside shoveling snow for a brief moment and noticed Pete left her sight for maaaaybe thirty seconds. She walked inside to check on him and found the amber, choco-sugary evidence.

Needless to say, a long talk was had.

I'm not joking when I say I wish I was home.

Photo of the Moment - Winter Pete

2010-02-12T11:35:00.001-05:00

There's nothing about this photo I don't love. It's a perfect winter snapshot. The chilly, red nose that's probably running. The sleepy eyes. The flat, static-clung hair. The barely visible pacifier rash around his mouth. The partially unbuttoned PJs - a very common style in our house. Almost as common as the complete lack of clothing fad of 2004-present. And finally - the expression. One part mischievous, one part satisfaction, one part tolerance of his photographer.

The kid does so much with one quick portrait.

So We Got a Little Snow

2010-02-10T23:16:00.002-05:00

If you're not from this area and you've heard about the historic East Coast storm - believe every word. 28" over the weekend followed by another 15" or so today. So yeah - my shoveling muscles are huge (read: painful). If you are from this area - can you believe this?

The boys haven't been affected by it too much. It was a bit too blizzardy today but we were able to play in it over the weekend. It was our own Ice Planet Hoth, complete with snow fort, clandestine searches for stormtroopers and a generous diet of snow. That's why you see the photo of Vincent with the towel. They needed something to dry off their frozen mouths following their gluttonous, icy meal.

I still kind of love it. I've always loved snow. Shoveling? Sure. Wearing a ski hat 24/7? I'm in. Working from home? Check. So bring it on Jack, we can handle it. We're tough here. Although the cabin fever is starting to get a little out of hand. I came upstairs from the basement/my home office this afternoon to the sight of Peter peeling off a Cowardly Lion costume with nothing underneath but what God gave him. Upon asking Rose what was going on, she replied, "He's Chewbacca. Vincent's Han. They're hunting down stormtroopers."

Apparently, Chewy is naked under his fur. Who knew?

Food is good

2010-01-22T22:48:00.000-05:00

Our friend Corinne (or Lindy as she's also called by pretty much everyone but us), is writing a new food blog. If you like food, recipes and people with several names who write about such things, go check out http://www.kismetmess.blogspot.com/.

Tell her Pete sent you.

Photo of the Moment

2010-01-20T22:44:00.000-05:00

Christmas present from Santa Mom-Mom & Grampa. A badass air hockey table. Next thing I know, the boys will go all Kelly Leek on me.

Bad News Bears reference anyone? Kevin?

Brooklyn, Brooklyn

2010-01-17T12:04:00.006-05:00

It's funny what kids hang onto. This song by the Avett Brothers, for instance. I got into it a few months ago and started playing it while we were out and about, thinking the boys might like it. To my surprise, they started requesting it. I can see why. It's sweet and simple and above all - very clear. The sentences are short and kid-friendly. The production is simple with heavy emphasis on the voices and piano.

What I didn't expect was them to sit and listen to it in rapt attention all the way through. It's a five minute song. It's also rather melancholy. Still, I have a theory on why they paid so much attention.

First, I told them early on that the singers were brothers. You know, easily relatable to their lives. Two brothers who grew up playing music together. Vincent started asking which brother was singing which part. I showed him the video so he could put faces to the voices. Now he keeps a running play-by-play whenever we listen to it. ("That's the brother with the long hair who plays piano, not the brother with the beard who plays the drums.")

There's also significance to the song's use of Brooklyn. Though they've never been there, the boys know it pretty well. A couple of their favorite books take place there - Sara Varon's Chicken and Cat Clean Up and Mo Willems' Knuffle Bunny. We also have good friends who live there that the boys chat with every now and then, who also send cool presents - including one of the aforementioned books. And finally, whenever we visit cousins Joe, Rachel & John, we drive past parts of Brooklyn, including Coney Island. They've come about as close as a 5 and 2 1/2 year old can come without actually visiting, so in their own way, they must find comfort in the song's chorus.

Finally, I can't say how awesome it feels to see my kids enjoying music. It's one thing to see them dancing along to Yo Gabba Gabba (kind of awesome in its own right). It's another thing altogether to share a song. Especially an unexpected one.

Perspective

2010-01-14T07:15:00.005-05:00

January can be tough. Long days. Short nights. Cold. And I think it's actually 65 days long as opposed to 31. That's just been passed, I believe.

So for people like you and me that aren't big fans of January, it takes a nice little light of perspective to say, "Hey Jim. Stop it. Things are fine. Wear a scarf and deal."

This week, that perspective was coming home to Peter asking me to blow up this Whoopee Cushion again and again so he could, "make toot sounds."

He'd put it on the couch and hop on top of it, erupting in laughter. He'd squeeze it between his hands. He'd just walk around with it.

And it was great. It's the little things. Thanks, pretend flatulence device.

Reason #4,567 why I love my kids.

The Holidays: A Photo Journal

2010-01-10T21:40:00.013-05:00

Giving you what you came here for - photos. No words, just pitcherz.

Things started out with a proper train ride with Santa a few weeks back. West Chester to Glen Mills and back with banjos, Santa, Caroline and hot chocolate? Done and done.

Hot. Chocolate. is. no. joke.

This is my cousin and she's awesome.

We experimented with making and decorating our own cookies this year as well. I could write a cute quip about eating the icing before it made it onto the cookies but I won't. Instead, I'll tell you that THE ICING WAS EATEN BEFORE IT MADE IT ONTO THE COOKIES.

Why not wear a Santa outfit while decorating cookies? It's Christmas dagnabbit.

Christmas morning brought with it our new favorite obsession - Star Wars. This one was inevitable. And of all of the obsessions so far, this one is by far the best.

But this train obsession is quite great as well. I mean, who doesn't like trains?

Christmas at home followed by Christmas at Mom-Mom & Grampa's followed by battling your own mother. That's what the holidays are all about.

Shortly thereafter, the debut of our new family band - Grampa on hot vocals, Kyle on the skins and Vincent on low-slung guitar. Full disclosure: this was the first time I ever played Rock Band. I'm old. And yeah, we destroyed it.

A foot of snow, highs of 8 degrees and winter's glistening splendor = a week in Vermont!

I'm ready to ice skate! ARE YOU!?

Wait a second. This is ice. These are blades that are the width of a pencil and I just learned to walk about 20 months ago. Logically, this doesn't compute.

This guy took to it immediately. He was literally running across the ice, pushing these milk crates. I mean - skatin' ain't easy people!

Chillin' before the next run. I was waiting for him to take a swig of a water bottle like a goalie.

Ah - solid ground.

There really is no better way to wind down than to count and organize some antique Star Wars figures.

And hey - sorry for the wait, friends. Things is crazy. It won't take 3 weeks until the next one. For serious.

Happy New Year (Not Really a New Post)!

2010-01-08T10:39:00.003-05:00

I know, I know! So neglectful. We've got a lot to show you, friends. Christmas, post-Christmas trip to Vermont, assorted fun and games.

But not yet. Getting back to the grind has been more difficult than expected and thus, this cuteness dissemination portal has been left dormant.

Not for much longer, friends.

I promise.

Sorry, Kate.

Happy New Year!

Christmas Came Early This Year

2009-12-21T07:00:00.001-05:00

Vincent had "Santa's Secret Shop" at school this past week. You know, where you get to shop at school with "your own money" and they help you pick and wrap the presents. Vincent loved this. So much so that he didn't want to wait until December 25th to give us all our gifts. Christmas came on December 15th this year.

He was intensely proud of this activity, which was so cool to see. He had never had the experience of independent shopping before. And he was practical to boot. Check out what I got - it's an ice scraper inside a warm and fuzzy mitt! And it's personalized!! How appropriate for this past weekend, too.

Our child has done his part to help the GDP. And he's proud of it.

Christmas Spirit?

2009-12-18T15:34:00.000-05:00

You may remember this. Or even this. Well I apologize but this year's version isn't nearly as exciting. I still kind of love it for different reasons, though. It's like they're thinking, "C'mon. That all you got, dude? Entertain me. Some ear flapping and tail wagging and I'm supposed to be impressed?"

It's also a very honest representation of the past few months. The stir-craziness caused by too much time at home recovering from the latest minor illness has us all in a bit of a trance. We need some serious time away from...stuff.

Now if it started speaking to each of them specifically and reciting their Christmas lists, then we'd be onto something.

Don't let me downplay their excitement for the holidays, though. They're at great ages for this time of year and we're trying to involve ourselves in as much as possible. You gotta get it in while you can, right? Soon enough they'll be waiting for a real dog to be shaking it's ears and tail on the floor, singing holiday songs.

No. We're not getting a dog.

Yet.

The Island of Misfit Toys

2009-12-16T21:28:00.002-05:00

The handiwork of a three year old with a multitude of Christmas knick knacks at his level. Headless Nutcrackers. Maimed Santas. Busted ornaments. All collected on the kitchen counter for eventual gluing. You think they come alive at night to sing and dance?

Masked Medicine Man

2009-12-11T22:57:00.006-05:00

This is what happens when you don't take your medicine. This masked figure will approach you and force you to take it. DON'T YOU FORGET IT.

I Am Your Father.

2009-12-01T21:46:00.001-05:00

This is the greatest. Some of Vincent's friends have been talking to him about Star Wars. He hadn't gotten into it previously so now he's curious. A few weeks back, we rented the first one (Episode IV, the real first one), sat down and watched the whole thing. The film is pretty heavy on politics and setup but he enjoyed several moments and wanted to know more about the characters.

I told him I had a whole case full of guys in Mom-Mom's basement and that blew his mind. We picked them up and he hasn't been the same since. Constantly taking them out, setting them up, putting them back, asking names, affiliations, what the other movies are like. I'm completely geeked out and heartwarmed at the same time. We've got Empire and Jedi set to record later this week (is Jedi too much for a 5 year old? Jabba, the Rancor...) and we're both equally pumped.

I'm sure this is a common thing among 30 something Dads - reliving the Star Wars glory days. My question is, how come it still resonates with kids? What is it about Star Wars? Is The Force real?

Pink Drips, Eardrum Rips & Busted Lips

2009-11-28T23:13:00.009-05:00

Pete - singin' the blues.

You know I'm not one to complain when we get sick. Its such a normal part of parenthood, family life, preschool, whatever. Kids bring germs home. They cough, sneeze and breathe all over everything, infect the house, give it to their parents, get it back from their parents, blah blah blah. It's the cold season. It happens.

Still, this season has been some bullshit. Over and above the typical stuff. About 6 weeks ago, I started a Brett family pink eye co-op. I had never had it in my life before getting it most likely from a hotel while away for work (gross, right?). So I took some drops, but probably not for as long as I should have. A week later, Peter's got it. We followed the protocol for him and took him to his pediatrician. A week of antibiotic drops later and he's golden.

Two weeks later, I get it again. Then he gets it again. Then me again briefly. Then my Mom, who watches the boys a couple of days a week. It was conjunction junction around here. Four rounds of sheet, pillowcase, blanket, everything washings later and things appear to be back to normal. Fingers crossed.

From there, Rosalie gets a bad ear situation - clogging, pain, ringing. She battles through Thanksgiving, which we hosted, and woke up the next day with serious issues. Bad ear infection. So bad that it most likely ruptured her eardrum. For real. We weren't exactly sure because she's a Spartan and doesn't really tell people when she's in pain. So she's been down for the count this weekend, letting the antibiotics do their good work. By the way, are there many worse words in the English language than "ruptured?" Name me five.

Finally, earlier today, the boys and I were outside when Peter took off for the house, tripped over a stone step and smashed right onto the edge of the deck, lips-first. The poor kid was pouring blood as I scooped him up, ran inside, kicking the door open like a firefighter to work on him. Luckily no teeth were damaged but he bonked the everloving hell out of his upper lip. Brilliant idea of the month goes to my sick wife, who brought him a popsicle to bring the swelling down, knowing he woudn't keep ice on his lip for more than 3 seconds. But would he keep wild berry sugar-ice? Yes.

He's fine now but he's definitely aware of his huge top lip ("I can't eat my chicken because I've got a broken lip, Mommy."). On top of that, it makes for a very uncomfortable pacifier experience so he went to bed for the first time in his life tonight without one. Tearlessly!

I may change the name of this blog to Warrior Milk after all these tough people I live with. So bring it on, winter. That all you got?

Oh, it is? Good.

Peter Camus

2009-11-24T08:06:00.007-05:00

I've written previously about the random thoughts that kids, Peter in this instance, always seem to verbalize. It's one of the simplest, most unexpected pleasures of parenting.

You want an example? Sure. I've got a couple. With Pete, it usually happens just before I leave his bed to let him fall asleep. He'll be chillaxing with BlankiePaci and suddenly pop Paci out of his mouth, turn to me and whisper something like this.

"Dad. Dad. Do squirrels eat flowers?"

"Dad. Dad. Dad. Whennnn. Ummm. When I drop my ketchup on the floor. At McDonald's. Who cleeeaans it up?"

What's great about it is that we both get a fun little existential quiz every night. It's the little things like this I think about at this time of year. Thankful as hell for them.

Photo of the Moment

2009-11-18T21:16:00.001-05:00

Kids. Leaves. Welcome to Marchwood in November, friends.

38 bags as of today, btw. We're only getting revved up.

Rock

2009-11-16T21:00:00.003-05:00

Pure rock & roll. He's going crazy to The Hives' "Declare Guerre Nucleaire," which is pure rock & roll filth in the best possible way. Immediately after this was shot, he asked to hear it again and just before I obliged, I played the first 2 seconds of Them's seminal "I Can Only Give You Everything" just to mix it up a little. He was overly tired (from rocking, of course), got angry with me and threw his guitar.

I reprimanded him for throwing his valued instrument but I'd be lying if there wasn't a tiny part of me thrilled with the audacity and Pete Townsendness of it all.

Oh, and speaking of tired, the other audio you hear is poor, sleepy Pete, whining ever so quietly and wanting no more of this noise.

Words of the Week

2009-11-11T14:33:00.002-05:00

Quick follow-up to my previous post. Over the weekend, Peter sneezed violently, right into his most prized possession - Blankie. He looked up sadly to Rosalie and said,

"I bless youd on my blankie."

Sickies

2009-11-10T22:16:00.003-05:00

We've got some sickness up in here. Over the past month, none of us have been able to get healthy. The boys have been battling fevers and colds. Pete and I have been trading conjunctivitis, Rose feels like garbage - it's neverending. Sure, it could be worse but I figured I'd give you an explanation of why we've been among the missing lately. We're kind of a mess.

So we've upped the tea intake. We've introduced the boys to the non-Taurine Vitamin Water flavors (Grape and Orange). We've invested in childrens' Motrin. We've visited the doctor and we're fighting back. But stay away from us for another week or so. It could be this.

I'm not kidding.

Happy Halloween, y'all.

2009-10-31T14:21:00.003-05:00

From the rootinest, tootinest...um...family this side of the Susquehannie. For the one or two people who don't know who this is, it's Jessie from Toy Story 2. Find her here if you don't believe us.

Happy Halloween, friends. Photos of the boys and their entourage to come.

Photo Catch-Up

2009-10-27T20:01:00.001-05:00

Things have been moving so quickly lately that I'm feeling a catch-up is in order. For us as well as anyone who reads this. Lots happening, little time to stop and take it in. Let's take a few moments, shall we?

First day of school. The backpack means we're no longer messing around.

Cousin John enjoying the Brett Bros.' fingerpainting experience.

Vincent showing off the preferred painting hardware.

Perhaps the greatest photo ever taken of my sons. Rosalie gets the credit. Something about Pete's expression and Vincent sort of hiding. This was in the middle of a serious driveway painting session.

Now this is interesting. Veeery interesting.

Workin' on his Scooby Doo pinata. Yep - they still make Scooby Doo stuff and yep - Vincent is into it.

Pete picking apples at Highland Orchards. He's not in mid-throw motion. Rather, I simply asked him to show me his apple. And no, he didn't throw it at me.

"Jim, I'm an adult. Why do I need to show you this apple? It's an apple."

Shades n' tongues.

I think we're gonna frame this one.

He couldn't "walk another step."

Our backyard, October. This is the image I need to keep with me when I'm picking up leaves into January. They were beautiful at one point.

Cheers, fall.

An Idea (This post is about leaves)

2009-10-25T11:35:00.003-05:00

As you may have discerned from the 78 posts I wrote about leaves last fall and winter, our yard is no stranger to autumn's bountiful product. As much as we'd love to pay someone hundreds of dollars to magically make them all go away one day, it's not in the cards. I could always resort to nuns and college students again but that was too weird. So for this year, our second in this house, we're thinking about drinking them away. Or rather, having a leaf cleanup party. Using good food, good beer and our personal charms and cute children to lure friends and family over, put a giant brown bag in their hands and let them have at it. Sounds fun, right? You know it does. So look for future posts - and potentially a Facebook invite if I can bring myself to do it. There's nothing like helping out friends in need while getting good and drunk and throwing leaves around. That's what I always say, at least.

Five

2009-10-19T15:41:00.003-05:00

The big man turned five yesterday. Five. years. old. We always heard the cliche about how fast it goes but man - that's no joke. We've been parents for 5 years. There's something official about the number five. Half a decade. This is serious here, people.

I'll post photos from his birthday weekend soon, but I just had to stop from the tornado that is life for a minute and think about this. Five.

Vincent is five.

Happy birthday, big kid.

The Auntie Kate Conversations

2009-10-13T06:12:00.002-05:00

I love it when I get unsolicited content. My sister Kate sent this my way recently. The boys were with my Mom and decided to call Auntie Kate. She then transcribed the conversations and sent them to me not knowing that doing so would get her published. You have to love it when kids get on the phone.

Call #1:
Auntie Kate: Hello?
Vincent: Hi.
Auntie Kate: Hey buddy! What are you doing?
V: Auntie Kate, I need you to call...can you call...the um, mouse...the....(pause to consult with Mom-Mom)...the Mole Protector?
AK: The Mole Protector?
V: Yeah, we have a mole mystery and we need you to call the mole protector.
AK: Ok!
V: Ok, bye.
Click

Call #2:
AK: Hello?
V: Hi.
AK: What’s up?
V: Auntie Kate, can you call Scooby Doo and the Gang?
AK: Sure.
V: and Super Why?
AK: Sure.
V: We’ve got some more mysteries to solve.
AK: Oh. Got it.
V: Guess what I had for breakfast
AK: What?
V: Orange juice, and soup!
AK: Soup isn’t breakfast!
Click

Call #3
AK: Hello?
Pete: Hi Auntie Kate!!!!!
AK: Hey Pete! How’s it going?
P: What are you doin’ at work?
AK: I’m typing. What are you doing at Mom Mom’s?
P: I was a bad boy.
AK: You were being a bad boy?
P: Yeah!
AK: Why?
P: I were throwing orange juice out all over the place
AK: You poured your orange juice out on purpose? Yeah, you shouldn’t do that.
P: How’s Kyle doin?
AK: He’s good, he’s at home.
P: Why?
AK: Because he doesn’t have to go to work yet
P: Kay. What are you doin’ at work?
AK: I’m typing
Crinkle crinkle beep beep Mom mom in background
Vincent again: Auntie Kate?
AK: Yeah buddy?
V: Can you also call the Incredibles?
AK: You got it
V: K
click

Citrus

2009-10-05T06:37:00.000-05:00

Tell me. What is it about sour citrus fruits that kids love? Is it just my kids? They love lemons and limes. Both of them. We go to a restaurant and have to order a few extra at the beginning of the meal. That's really the only time they get them or else Dr. Jeff the Dentist will give us The Enamel Lecture.

Friends with kids - do you have little sour addicts, too?

Soccer Kid

2009-10-02T06:09:00.003-05:00

*It’s not easy to decipher which one he is in the photos. Just look for one of the smaller kids with the gray long-sleeve under the black t-shirt.
Another season, another first. The big man started a 7-week soccer intro program last week. Quite honestly, it was at the encouragement of Chief since soccer has never been something I was enthusiastic about. I played for one year when I was about 10. Our team went 1-11 for a tyrannical, Napoleonic Greek coach who's daughter kicked the ball so hard she nearly she put me out of commission with a shot to the mid-section. So yeah, I was more of a baseball kid.

When it comes to my kids though, I'll go with the flow. And after a little bit of reassurance, Vincent jumped in headfirst. The program itself is pretty great. Coached by two really young British kids (one English and properly fauxhawked, one Scottish), the group learns about soccer and the context of soccer through games and basic exercises. It wasn't the pure chaos of other youth soccer programs nor was it a competitive atmosphere. It was based on fun. At one point, the coaches were teaching the kids how to plead to a referee not to give them a red card. No joke. So yeah - a little about the real context of soccer, which I'm totally ok with.

He really seemed to enjoy it, which showed me a lot. For as apprehensive as he's been with change so far in his life (...wonder where he gets that...), he rolled right along with this. I was fully prepared to have to nudge him every Saturday morning but I doubt I'll have to. Maybe it was my nervousness that he'd have to play for an overlord with a testicle-seeking footed daughter.

Nope. All fun and games. Soccer - my new favorite sport.

Words of the Week

2009-09-24T06:07:00.002-05:00

Our bedtime routine underwent some changes once Peter got his big boy bed. Remember, their beds are pushed together. After books, I tuck both of them in, then lay with Pete for a few minutes, make up songs, help him turn his brain off until he's ready to konk. From there, I crawl over to Vincent's bed, let him scratch my arm (a longtime comfort mechanism of his), while stretching to hold Pete's hand with my free extremity. If you could have a photo of it, I would look ridiculous.

Lately, Vincent hasn't needed much help getting to sleep. After nearly five years of difficulty, the combination of Peter in the room and the routine beginning with Peter, thus forcing him to wait, has allowed him to figure out how to put himself to sleep. As great as this feat is, he doesn't much care for it. He wants the time to armscratch while still awake. Which leads us to this week's words.

Last night, the books were done, the light was out, the tucking was finishing and I said, "Okay Vincent, I'll be over in five minutes but you'll probably already be asleep." To which he replied in that quiet whine of an exhausted kid,

"I don't want me to be!"

Truck Accident

2009-09-20T12:33:00.001-05:00

A couple of weeks back, we attended our local Touch a Truck event. You may remember (or you may not) me writing about this a couple of years back. I went on a tirade about clowns. Still hate 'em, by the way. So the gist of Touch a Truck is this - tons of local civil service, construction and labor companies park their coolest trucks in a giant municipal lot and kids can climb all over them. It's great, cheap fun. No, I'm not writing about this as an excuse to show you awesome photos. I'm writing about it because it directly relates to one of the great early traumas in Pete's life.

The night he got his penis caught in a truck.

No, not a real truck thankfully. A toy truck. Here's the deal. It was about 7:30 PM and he was playing with his toys, naked. This isn't an uncommon occurrence. The boys take baths and like that time to prance around freely before being confined in their PJs. I mean, who wouldn't? This is the time before they learn self-consciousness so it's our job as parents to encourage behavior like this.

So he's playing with his trucks, naked, in a corner facing the fireplace. I can only see the back of him from across the room. Suddenly I hear an odd sound and I turn to see a pretty wicked pre-cry. You know, like a "JESUS CHRIST WHAT DID I JUST DO?" moment before the pain strikes? This was the moment he realized that a small portion of his penis had gotten stuck around the tire of one of his small, motorized toy trucks.

Then the screaming starts and I run over to see what the deal is. The issue is immediately apparent and I quickly decide to remove him from the cramped area and into a more suitable operating environment. Upon laying him down on the couch, I'm trying to figure out how to deal with this. Pete's screaming, Vincent's hovering, Rose is trying her best to help but I'm freaking out as much as Pete is. Empathy and all. After about 30 seconds that felt like 30 days, I wound the wheel back, releasing the tiny imprisoned piece of Pete's boyhood. The relief in the room was palpable and after a bit of ice, he was a new man. No blood or permanent damage. The kid's got one tough...erm...situation.

There's no moral here other than the obvious one - don't get your motorized toys near your penis. Even today, the kid remembers it well. He raced a little car across the kitchen floor saying, "Watch out, Daddy. You don't want it to get your peesh."

Lessons learned.

Words of the Week

2009-09-18T08:10:00.002-05:00

New feature on Da Milk - funny verbal tidbits from the past week (or so. Yeah - sorry for the delay). It's our version of Kids Say the Darndest Things.

Vincent started his new school this week and it being a parochial school, he was introduced to the concept of holy water - something that could be confusing to the newcomer.

Upon telling my Mom about his first day, one of the first things he mentioned was this phenomenon:

"Mom-Mom (smiling)! They gave me God water!"

Refreshing God Water. You know, we should think about marketing that.

In the Milky Way

2009-09-04T14:55:00.004-05:00

I make a daily case for always having a camera on me. These were taken during a very quick trip to Milky Way Farm in Chester Springs. The place is great. You can go eat homemade ice cream, then get super close to real animals. If it gets better than that, these kids don't know it. So with bellies full, they walk from stinky animal to stinky animal while we feverishly try to capture cool moments before they run away to the next thing. It was around 7:30pm, so the light was really nice.

<---When I broke out my camera(phone), there were only two calves checking Vincent out. The black one must've stuck its head out at the very last second and it totally makes it.

This one (below) is the real Vincent and Pete. Anticipating the arrival of a friendly sheep that 2 seconds later they will both jump back away from, fearing a lick.

That's all I got for now. Stay tuned for photos of giant trucks and a related story that will make my male readers cringe. Only minor injuries, of course.

Laying Down the Law

2009-09-01T17:27:00.003-05:00

Let me preface this by saying the boys are usually good. We have our days, as all families do, but they're good kids. That said, the following is an entire voicemail, left for me by my beloved wife today that I thought bore transcription. Rose - don't hate me.

9/1/09

3:22 PM, a very calm and rational-sounding wife:

"Hey babe, it's me. I'm in the middle of a bit of a standoff here...sooo.... I am not going to be cleaning up the family room. I told the boys ten times they had to do it (Ed. note - Clean up after themselves.) so ummm.. they're not allowed to do anything tonight until that room gets cleaned up. I mean, I'm gonna be here for the next hour then I think you need to be the one to make them do it (Ed. note - She was meeting a friend for dinner - a rare treat) but if not, I think you have to be the one to enforce it...because...I just....I can't do anything other than ask a million billion times and punish and...we're already not getting a DVD from the library this week and so...that's it. If they would rather play than clean up the mess than that's fine but they have to clean it up tonight when you get home. Ok? Ok - love you."

Ah parenthood. I learned later that Pete had squeezed toothpaste all over his feet today as well. Wish I had a picture of that, actually.

Dear stay-at-home parents - you rule.

Fudgsicle Soup

2009-08-24T20:41:00.003-05:00

The boys cracked each other up tonight making some "fudgsicle soup." It started innocently enough, with the boys...well...eating fudgsicles. Then Vincent rubs it on his nose to get a laugh, Pete follows suit and the next thing you know, it's in both of their hair, on their clothes and bowls are swinging all over the table.

Meanwhile, instead of stopping it, Daddy's reaching for the camera to put the episode on his blog because it's hilarious. I only wish I could've captured Peter laughing at his hardest. You get a bit of it here but there was a point when he couldn't catch his breath.

Ah to be young and sugared.

The OC

2009-08-19T19:57:00.011-05:00

It's taken us a couple of weeks to go through our photos from Ocean City. Well, we've done it and here they are. I'll save commentary for my captions below.

Pete and I had an early morning one day on the beach. Early enough that I didn't think I needed to change him out of his PJs. I was wrong.

Speaking of mornings, here they are feeding some intense seagulls.

I have a tattoo. Whatevs.

Love this one. Grampa and Uncle Joe trying to get the kite to work with Vincent looking on intently.

I'm Caroline. I like Cheese Doodles. This is how I eat them.

Look closely and you'll see yours truly playing backseat police helicopter driver.

The seagull feeding morning. On watch.

Love this one. Blankie & Paci making an appearance with Mommy.

Blurry buddies.

I have a thing for taking pictures of shoes. Why?

The Karate Kid.

Vincent wore this through the entire first two days. On the beach and everything. Super Why.

With Auntie Kate. And Super Why.

The Experiment Begins

2009-08-14T06:13:00.005-05:00

I came home yesterday to a dismantled crib and Vincent saying, "Pete's new bed is ready!"

Rosalie and I have been saying he needs his own bed for weeks now. He wakes up multiple times in the night bonking into the top or the sides. His pacifier (yep - still has it) falls out. He's two. It's time. So we were gifted a hand-me-down full-sized bed from our good friends Erick & Ellen and my wife took it upon herself to make it happen yesterday. By herself with two kids no less. She's a superhero. My only contribution was bringing the mattress upstairs.

Our plan, as it has been all along, was to put Peter's bed directly next to Vincent's. Meaning, no space between them. That way, Vincent can climb into Pete's bed if he wants and vice versa. Leaving Mommy & Daddy happily rested and content for all times.

Night 1 - not so much.

Not that we expected that but there was indeed some screaming involved. Pete wasn't used to it so he was crying. His crying woke Vincent up and made him cry. Both wanted us to stay with them. To their credit (and ours) though, we made them deal with it. We tucked them both back in, sat for a couple of minutes, then left. And it seemed to work. Part of that could have been how incredibly exhausted they both were (Vincent woke up around 6:15 to see me off to work) but we're proud of them. Let's see how Night 2 goes.

Oh - I know I've used the word, "experiment" in the title, implying that if this doesn't "work" we'll somehow change the plan or abandon it.

That would be an incorrect use of the word. It's going to work. Right?

Photos of the Moment

2009-08-12T12:24:00.000-05:00

Have there been more fireflies this summer? Maybe they're just more of a focus now that the boys are old enough to watch and catch 'em. The photo of Pete is blurry but I just love that dusky quality. He's trying his damndest to catch one. Just like Grampa below, who may have stepped in something while putting said firefly in a jar.

Vincent's Photo Journal

2009-08-09T20:19:00.004-05:00

A few weeks back, Vincent pushed and prodded me to use the camera. He wanted to take pictures of the backyard. I gave him a handful of rules (hold it with two hands, keep the cord around your wrist, etc.) and he was off.

I have to say, he took some really nice shots for a four year old. There are 30 or so and they really form a nice collection piece. Here are some highlights. Ansel Adams over here.

Another Favorite Book

2009-07-25T10:33:00.003-05:00

This was a library find that we keep on borrowing and renewing. Mo Willems is a great kids writer. He seems to give his young readers credit for having senses of humor. Not hitting kids over the head with obvious gags, but inbuing real life situations with sweetness and sarcasm.

I'm sure his name isn't new to you. He writes all the Don't Let the Pigeon...books, which are hilarious.

And he blogs! Check him out here - http://mowillemsdoodles.blogspot.com/. Long live the library and Mo Willems.

Green Mountain Week

2009-07-20T20:18:00.004-05:00

I'm not gonna do too much talking here. We've finally gone through our Vermont photos and picked some favorites. I will provide captions to guide your journey. And off we go.

The cousins. The boys with cousin John. We have a feeling these three will be causing somewhat of a ruckus in the years to come.

At Shelburne Farms, being introduced to a calf. No they didn't ask to bring it home. The smell of farm animals in person tends to take the novelty away.

On-site learning with Nonna. Did I set this shot up? Maybe. That display was there, though. And yes, it's all varieties of animal poop. Daah Vermont.

Vermont Teddy Bear Factory, takin' in all in. If you're ever in the area, do the tour. It's free for kids and TWO DOLLARS for adults. Yeah yeah, I know the money's in the gift shop but seriously, TWO. DOLLARS.

Chillin' with John, again. Workin' on some chocolate milk.

We were here.

Pete, pointing things out on the muddiest strawberry picking patch ever with cousin Maria. They were delicious when cleaned, although I can't say dirty ones weren't consumed. One or two.

Rose - who had no qualms at all about hopping right into the mud. "We're here. Let's do it!"

Vincent and I, water feet portrait.

He sat here for about 5 seconds. He and John loved the front porch. It was like neither of them had ever seen one before. "Give us some rocks and some bubbles, and we're good. Go on ahead inside."

The daredevil. We're loving his long hair, btw.

Early morning. Pre-coffee, pre-orange juice, pre-happiness.

It looks like he's about to slide into oblivion.

And there you have it. If you can, you have to check out this state in the summer. Tons of stuff to do, great food (and beer), weather. I don't think we can let you stay with our amazing hosts, but you'll do fine on your own. One caveat - nearly every male has a beard. I'm kind of not kidding. Go Vermont!

More Fun with Teeth

2009-07-17T06:14:00.002-05:00

I made the mistake last night of telling Vincent about his aforementioned cavity. Yeah - we didn't feel the need to tell him previously because we knew he might be freaked by it.

He was more just concerned about it. "When will it go away?" "When will it fall out?" "Will the dentist have to fill it?" "Will I need a pinchy shot?"

I went the brushing and flossing route in my responses, and I think we'll be fine. He'll be 5 in October. Isn't that when these early ones are supposed to come out? C'mon Tooth Fairy, do your thing!

And if it wasn't for these kids shows talking about how bad cavities are - portraying them as evil, mustachioed demons attacking your body, it wouldn't feel as grave.

Or maybe we should've eased up on the chocolate milk. That too.

Playing with Fire

2009-07-14T21:05:00.003-05:00

Please pardon my disappearance. Our trip to Vermont (photos later) coupled with some work craziness has made me nearly catatonic during the hours I'd typically be blogging. With that out of the way, let's talk dental care.

Vincent has had a cavity between his two front teeth (remember all that chocolate milk we had to give him when he was "underweight?") for over a year now. His dentist is reluctant to fill it considering he'll be losing the tooth pretty soon and that procedure can't be fun for a kid as young as Vincent. Instead, he prescribed a steady diet of brushing and flossing and so far, it hasn't gotten any worse.

Recently though, Rose seems to think it has gotten bigger. Which scares me. So tonight we flossed the crap out of it. It doesn't seem to hurt him, so I guess we'll just have to see.

No more Fun Dip before bed, I guess.

Team Summer, Pt. 2

2009-07-03T19:58:00.000-05:00

Continuing our search for FCF we've been keeping hella busy lately. The past month has included trips to the Philadelphia Zoo (if you buy a membership, it becomes FCF after two visits!) with Joe, Rachel, buddy John, Zio, Aunt Theresa, Uncle George and Nonna, as well as a weekend at the Jersey Shore with Mom-Mom, Grampa, Aunt Maria, Uncle Joe Caroline, Auntie Kate and Kyle.

Us = jetsetters. Ok, maybe minivansetters.

This Book Rules

2009-07-01T19:56:00.002-05:00

Great for teaching colors and the first forays into reading comprehension. Go get it for yer kids. Caldecott winner, too - if you're into that sort of thing.

This was Pete's bridge book into books about excavators, backhoe loaders and cranes - all of which he says with ease to the amazement of the adults around him.

Street Toughs - A Follow-Up

2009-07-01T06:57:00.002-05:00

Chief confirmed it yesterday. The "smashed" kid was like 14 and laughing the whole time. Vincent was part of the fun.

So obviously I exploited the situation to comic effect on this here blog, but I think I need to relax a little bit.

Just in general.

Our Sons are Street Toughs

2009-06-29T19:48:00.004-05:00

We’ve got a great park within walking distance of our house that the boys go to frequently. With Rose, me, Chief, anyone willing to take them. So it wasn’t out of the ordinary when, one night this week, I got home and asked the boys how the park was that day. This is the reply I got from my younger son:

“We smashed a kid!”

Wait. WHAT?

“Yeah!”

Rose and I were totally confused. Had Chief brokered their initiation into a local street gang? Had they been violent all along and we hadn’t noticed? WHAT THE HELL DOES “WE SMASHED A KID MEAN?!”

So Vincent explained that he had his bike and was riding around in the vicinity of some older kids. They were playing with him and must’ve been messing with a friend of theirs sitting outside the group and told Vincent, the impressionable 4-year old, to run over him with his bike.

“So I did.”

At this point, we had no idea what happened and asked where Chief was. We were assured he was, “right there,” which meant it couldn’t have been that big of a deal. We were also assured that the kid didn’t cry. We proceeded to gently tell Vincent that he shouldn’t ever smash any kids with his bike, no matter who tells him. We also vowed to each other to find out the whole story as this surely is painting Chief – who’s great with the boys - in the wrong light.

We'll get back to you on this one, friends.

Smarts

2009-06-20T06:31:00.000-05:00

Vincent imparting some wisdom on his brother:

"Peter, some people are smart. Some people are not smart.

We're smart."

Hmmm...No idea where that came from. Maybe it's his new graduate status that has him all highfalutin.

The Nest

2009-06-18T22:02:00.001-05:00

Great shot of a bird's nest we found in one of the trees in our yard. We tried our best not to disturb it but keeping Vincent away from something this interesting proved to be difficult. He wanted to show everyone. Now these eggs are famous - as far as this blog goes. So, they're known by about 18 people.

Team Summer, Pt. 1

2009-06-16T21:43:00.003-05:00

We've been breaking in the new wheels lately, extending our reach all over the place in search of Fairly Cheap Fun (FCF). I'll be detailing our adventures here for all to see. The first of which was a trip to the Please Touch Museum in Philly with Auntie Kate and Grampa. I hadn't been there since I was a kid and it's completely different. Beautiful building, intuitively fun things for the kids to do, and really good, inexpensive food. Not much more can be said.We touched the hell outta that place.

The "Graduate"

2009-06-10T20:59:00.003-05:00

Our big man "graduated" from his first preschool this past week. I use quotation marks around the word graduated because he's not officially graduating. He's just moving on to another school. A lot of his friends, who are a year older, are graduating, so we figured it was a good time to transition him to his new school, where he'll be for his third year of preschool, kindergarten and eventually elementary school.

So they were nice enough to let him walk with his friends. And man did he eat it up. He executed each of the songs perfectly - paying full attention to the teachers and not once being distracted by his parents, Nan, Mom-Mom, Grampa or his kid brother.

All in all, it kind of made my heart hurt a bunch. In a good way.

"Congratulations" big boy.

Rad

2009-06-05T06:27:00.001-05:00

The newest member of the Exton BMX gang.

Status Report

2009-06-02T14:21:00.005-05:00

I’m guessing most of you live in a world where you’re constantly being asked for status reports. “Just give me the topline,” as they say. To that end, because things are happening at such a rapid-fire pace around here, I’ve prepared the following status report for my fine readership. This should give you what you need to move forward. I’ve also taken the liberty of writing it in the business-like manner many of us are used to – for easier reading.

Vincent
Vincent is preparing to complete his two years of coursework at his first educational institution. Although a third year of preschool remains, he’ll be switching schools in the fall to further acclimate himself with his new team. The transition is expected to be seamless.

Recently, Vincent was the recipient of a generous transportation donation. Mom-Mom Corp, a division of Mommom and Grampa Inc., released the dollars to fund a new two-wheeler bicycle with training wheels that Vincent has quickly grown accustomed to. We’ve mapped out routes to the park using said vehicle and excitement is building considerably toward its daily usage.

Lastly, Vincent has discovered an archive in our technology department. Years back, before the big office move and during a period where our player was non-existent, Chachi Milk elected to shut down our VHS facility. We’ve since had the IT department work on restoring functionality allowing Vincent to view feature films he’d previously not seen (i.e. Pete’s Dragon, Lady & the Tramp).

Excitement levels for these projects are high.

Peter
Peter’s communication has been exemplary. His direction is clear and his follow-through is solid. If he says he’s going to eat peanut butter crackers, he takes the initiative to get them himself from the supply, select several and consume them. He’s a self-starter.

Research has been a key component of Peter’s growth. His reliance on books about colors, foods and trucks has driven his insight on these topics and his determination to return often is to be commended. We’ve recently extended our collection east to the Chester County Library System to leverage learning opportunities.

Peter’s waste management has also been a key discovery. He’s been efficiently communicating when waste is due to be released and will take direction to the facilities for proper dissemination. He’s even realized the value that privacy can bring to this process, thus allowing a faster learning curve. This achievement is considerable and his supervisor has recommended a promotion to training pants.

I’ve reviewed his performance and agree with the recommendation.

Conclusion
Please allow this report to give you the most up-to-date information on our current situation. Please respond with questions or concerns.

###

Mobile Chachi

2009-05-22T08:00:00.001-05:00

Last Fall, I was provided with an iPhone for work. Let me preface this by saying how productive it makes me when I'm not in the office (in case anyone from work is reading this). A residual benefit has been that it takes pretty darn good photos. As if I didn't take enough already.

So the following is a quick display of some of my favorite mobile Chachi moments over the past 6 months or so. If you're my Facebook friend, you've probably seen many of these already. If not, enjoy. Especially baseball Jesus.

New Target.

Lunch break at the Please Touch Museum. Contemplative.

Making wishes on dandelions, Mom-Mom & Grampa's backyard.

Showing off a chocolate chip granola bar in front of an antique steam train, Strasburg Railroad.

Monkeying around with Uncle George, Yang Ming, Ardmore.

Cousin Criney's home sweet home.

Marchwood trikin'.

Pete's first haircut. Both faces are great.

Chasing after each other on the path at "Chief & Nan's Park."

Baseball Jesus. At Vincent's new school visit. Still totally cracks me up.

With Chief at their fishing spot.

Peanut Butter Cup with chopsticks. Nothing weird about that.

Showin' off the guns at Target (why is Target in here twice?).

Jungle gym - also at Chief & Nan's park.

Photo of the Moment

2009-05-19T22:17:00.003-05:00

Rose and I enjoying a kidless weekend in the city a few weeks back. I know we're not supposed to enjoy ourselves while away from them but we did. Sorry. We're under our impulse-purchased bright yellow umbrella here, in Rittenhouse Square. It was a rainy Sunday late morning/early afternoon, we had just completed a ridiculous (and moderately-priced) brunch at Tinto and were heading to find a gift for the boys. We were kind of soaked. Especially my Chucks. But it was great.

Tribute

2009-05-11T16:06:00.011-05:00

For the past couple of weeks, I’ve been trying to write about my grandfather. Or, Pop-Pop, as we all called him. He passed away on April 17th and I didn’t want to jump online and go blindly stream of consciousness. I wondered if this blog was even a forum to pay tribute to him meaningfully.

But then it struck me. This whole thing has always been about family. Recording and celebrating the big and little events and moments that become the months and years. And above all, that’s what Pop-Pop was – a family man. Enjoying each and every moment. The man fathered nine kids so let’s face it, he was a family man whether he was going to enjoy it or not. But he did.

So instead of diving back into his history, I’ve decided to remember him here through all the small moments and impressions I’ve collected of him over the past 32 years, in no particular order.

_____________

The summer we arrived in Ocean City (as we did every summer of my life) and he was missing his trademark moustache. I was probably 6 or 7 and it blew my mind.

Manhattans at restaurants, Screwdrivers at the shore.

Friday nights in Broomall with the Dukes of Hazzard.

The consummate host. Offering to get you something constantly.

The stories my Mom has told about the multitude of jobs he had, usually two or three at a time, to support his huge family.

He never once yelled at any of us grandkids (that I remember). Not once.

His whistle was so darn loud. Like amazingly loud.

“You’d never see a Marine doing that.” (tongue-in-cheek)

The little jokes that kept coming back. He’d catch someone drifting off into space and say, “Those little naps are nice, aren’t they?”

Hanging out with his older brother, making fun of each other, criticizing, joking. Like they were kids.

Whenever concentrating or working on something, he’d stick his tongue out over his top lip ever so slightly.
Heinie Manush. A lost baseball player he and his brother celebrated every summer for no good reason other than his name was Heinie Manush.

He liked both the Cowboys and the Eagles.
Maybe the single slowest eater I’ve ever encountered in my entire life. Chalk it up to enjoying every moment.

The Hardly Ables Retiree String Band. Greatest band name ever?

The sound of his tenor saxophone. Equal parts Lester Young and Stan Getz - soft, deep & lyrical. It sounded like he did.

He always called his wife, “Love.”

That last talk he and I had.

And the thousands of other memories I’m sure will creep up as the years go by and we all continue to feel his influence on our lives. Not that he would ever take credit for anything like that. Ultimately, he was a modest, sometimes shy person who’d rather not have the attention. Sorry Pop-Pop, you’ve got it now. So I’ll raise it up to him and celebrate a great man. Because that's what it's all about, isn't it?

My Little Smartasses

2009-05-06T20:03:00.002-05:00

I had solo duty tonight and during the boys' dessert, Peter decided he had to poop. He alerted Vincent and I to this fact, to which Vincent replies, "Thanks for telling me, Pete." We all shared a laugh at that, Vincent proud of his sarcasm.

A while later, after the deed had been completed, I was changing Peter and Vincent was hanging out close by for whatever reason. I was talking nonsense to them, as I'm prone to do at 8pm on a weeknight after a long day and I said, "Yep - you did some poops, Pete." To which he replied, after a perfect comic pause,

"Thanksfatellwinme."

All three of us laughed heartily, Peter proud of his sarcasm. Or proud that he made his Dad and big brother laugh.

Pete's Tweets

2009-05-05T13:52:00.000-05:00

Nearly everyday when I get home, Pete comes running top speed to the front door to quickly give me a top of mind alert. Usually it's something he's doing at that very moment or something monumental that happened that day. In fact, it would be a perfect fit for Twitter as they're typically less than 140 characters.

Mental picture - he usually has his one index finger in the air when he briefs me. And half the time he's partially naked. More often than not, he runs away immediately after his statement. It's one of the best parts of my day. A few examples:

"I don't like kettle corn. Just cheese popcorn."

"Broke a glass today."

"At the train station?"

"Didn't go to McDonald's."

"Nan cleaned the basement."

"Vincent got in the elevator. He was crying."

"Max and Ruby."

"Sippy beer?"

Riding the Rails

2009-05-01T20:24:00.003-05:00

What's rural, antiquated and smells intensely of manure at points? Strasburg Railroad!

It's actually great. Riding in an open air train through the Lancaster County countryside, seeing farms, animals and mounds of poop - perfect.

The boys totally loved it and we were able to successfully avoid the massive Thomas the Tank Engine store, which is truly obscene. We did purchase one of the actual 1920s steam engines themselves, though so I could control my own train schedule in the morning. Anyone know a conductor?

Happy Birthday, Peter Wallace.

2009-04-24T23:50:00.000-05:00

Our man Pete turns 2 today! Hard to believe, right? This here blog started a couple of days before he was born. You don't need me to tell you what he wants for his birthday. TRAINS! CAKE! TRAINS AND CAKE!

Strasburg Railroad, here we come. For now, enjoy some photos of his party last weekend. After spending some time with the Virginio family, a slew of our favorite people joined the Celebration of Peter, 2009. Best moment, when Peter asked to have a second piece of cake. Why was that funny? Because he wanted us all to sing again. And light candles again. And make more wishes. Then eat more cake.

Awesome.

Happy birthday, Peter Wallace. You can have as many pieces as you want, buddy.Vincent was the definition of a big brother. He actually enjoyed seeing Pete enjoying himself. Unprecedented.

Is it more Amtrak or Septa? Let's go with Amtrak - probably tastes better.

"Havinsumsalsa, Uncle George."

The celebration crew, or a portion of it, with our star at the center.

Minivan Blues

2009-04-19T19:32:00.003-05:00

There are certain clichéd “marks of parenthood” that a lot of parents have difficulty committing to. Parenthood itself is certainly one. Turning your home office into a nursery. Your family room into a playroom. The backseat of your car into a trashcan.

So when it comes to the things you have some control over, you hold on even tighter. Like buying a minivan.

Not to toot my own horn here but I was ready for one three years ago. I was sick of cramming the three of us (at that point) and our stuff into a sedan for long roadtrips. I knew the family would be expanding so I figured – let’s get rid of any semblance of cool right now. Let’s do this thing. On top of that, I had been broken in my 20s when playing in a six-piece band that had no money for a real van. The used New Yorker I had been driving at the time died its final death and I traded in my balls for a 1990 Dodge Caravan - that I not only drove to shows but to college.

So yeah, I was fine with it. Rosalie, on the other hand, was not. So we leased a small Toyota Highlander and crammed ourselves into it for 3 more years.

Until two weeks ago when she finally caved and joined the team. We are now the proud 56 month leasers of a new Toyota Sienna. Yeah – that is a long time, pal. Youbetcherassitis.

The boys love the thing. Not only is it new but they can walk around in it like it’s a house. Because it kind of is. 15 cup holders (!), tray tables, an automatic door, room for 68, 2 glove boxes (I mean, really) and 6 nasty, badass cylinders. No DVD player, though. We’re on a budget here, people.

I think Rose likes it. She seems fine with it. She’ll see the real value when we’re headed to the Shore or Vermont and the boys’ knees aren’t against their chests because there just wasn’t room for the stroller anywhere else and strapping it to the roof isn’t an option because of the one time it almost flew off on 95.

Yeah – I think she’ll come around.

Photo of the Moment

2009-04-12T20:52:00.002-05:00

There are a handful of topics I could write about now, but I need to sort them out a bit. On top of that, it's Sunday night and I'm kinda tired. So for now, I'll give you this awesome photo of Peter. About to turn 2, he's a joyful blur. I happened to capture him hiding from us behind the front door here. Just Pete being Pete.

Major League

2009-04-04T10:13:00.002-05:00

Some good friends of mine produce, write, direct, strategize, magnetize, massage, digest and breathe an online TV series called The League. Why am I telling you this? Yeah, I know it's got nothing to do with photos of my kids. Here's why:

1.) It's really funny and really well done.
2.) It's popular. Thousands and thousands of views popular.
3.) It's credentialized. As in "Business Week's Best of the Web, 2008" in the humor category.
4.) Season 2 just started last night with a live premiere that I couldn't attend making me feel terrible.
5.) My friends make it.

Oh, right - the plot. That's for you to figure out when you watch from the beginning, but it involves hitmen, pickles, magicians, clowns, nuns and all the usual fun TV subjects. Watch it here.

So pull up the old laptop, cozy up and enjoy. Just don't watch it at work. Or when kids are around. Or nuns.

Backyard Chronicles

2009-04-01T21:01:00.001-05:00

Oh hell yes. A temperate weekend! Below are photos from our YOU JUST TRY AND KEEP US INSIDE, JERK weekend, 2009.

Can you do this? Didn't think so. Um...can you help me down?

He swore he saw some kind of bug under this tree. I don't doubt him. It could've been Boogies.
The cover photo for his indie folk debut, Exton in March. Go ahead and see what happens if you try to help me.

Dear Spring,

I love you.

Your best friend,

Chachi Milk

The Squirrel Feeder

2009-03-30T20:01:00.005-05:00

This isn’t an uncommon sight.

In fact, it’s become a daily occurrence just outside of our kitchen window. Not only do we have several different bird species making our humble birdfeeder their daily breakfast, lunch & dinner stop, but we have a couple of brazen squirrels on the scene as well. They climb up the tree, out onto the branch and suspend themselves, sometimes upside down, in such a way as to tip birdseed into their mouths or down to a waiting accomplice below.

The boys like watching them as much as they like scaring them away. It’s only a couple of minutes before they’re back performing their stunts. I wonder if I can train them and put on shows around the neighborhood. Involving the boys would make it even more lucrative – two cute kids and two (sometimes three) acrobatic, fearless woodland creatures. There’s something there.

In this economic climate, the little buggers have to do something to earn their keep.

The squirrels, that is.

Climbing Up the Walls

2009-03-24T20:42:00.003-05:00

This doesn't need much explaining. Vincent can now climb the walls. And door frames. This is about two weeks old and since then, he's reached the very top before realizing it's a little high to jump down on his own. That's where we come in. It's really impressive to watch, actually. I don't think I've seen a kid do this.

Rose likens him to the banana tree dudes.

As you can see, it's only a matter of time before his brother follows in his adhesive footsteps.

Pictures? No. Penises? Yes.

2009-03-20T20:29:00.007-05:00

I'm sorry but my father-in-law (the oft-mentioned "Chief") has borrowed my home computer for a few days, thus leaving me photoless. Are you mad? You come here to see photos of my kids. I won't kid myself. Sure, the writing entertains from time to time but that's not the hook.

Soo....what should we talk about? Oh yeah - penises.

Pete is discovering the wonders of his own...um...situation. And his brother's. He finds his own in the tub, feels around a bit, laughs. You know the deal. Like any man. And if Vincent leaves himself unguarded for a few seconds?

Honk.

Pete just doesn't know the barriers yet. He's learning. Speaking of which, here's a conversation we all had just the other night:

Pete (getting his diaper changed): "Pieshy! (Italian colloquialism for penis).

Me: "Yep. That's your peishy."

Pete: "Vincent have pieshy. Peter have pieshy. Daddy have pieshy. Mommy have pieshy."

Me: "No Peter, Mommy doesn't have one."

(pause)

Pete: "Buy one."

Me: "Buy a pieshy?"

Pete: "Yeah. For Mommy."

Me, feeling awkward: "Um. Where do we buy one, Peter?"
Vincent overhearing, mockingly: "The Pieshy Store, Pete?! The Pieshy Store! (laughing)"

Pete: "PIESHY STORE! PIESHY STORE!"

Me: sigh

Yep. We're raising two boys.

The Ladybug Moment

2009-03-13T20:58:00.003-05:00

Taking advantage of the mild weather last weekend, I took an hour or so to bag up some of the remaining leaves in our yard. Yes, they’re still there, thawing out. But that’s not what this is about.

Vincent joined me outside while Pete was napping and set out to helping me. What typically happens during this process is when I get a bag nearly full, I call out for some “stomping help.” One of the boys runs over, I pick him up and use his body as a flattening device, holding him and jumping him up and down on top of the leaves. They love it and it’s productive!

We had done this a few times when, getting back to the pile itself, I spot a ladybug. I call Vincent over and after some very gentle fumbling, we get her (they can’t all be female but for the sake of simplicity, we referred to it as a she) onto Vincent’s hand. She slowly crawls around, up his arm, onto the front of his shirt and he’s super excited.

I ask him what we should name her and after a moment of thoughtful deliberation, he says, “Boogies.”

“Boogies the ladybug?” I ask.

“Yeah!”

So he runs inside to show Rose his new friend, losing her and gently picking her back up (safely) in the process. Later he comes back out with Boogies and says he’s going to place her on a tree to live. He asks if he’ll be able to come out and see her everyday to which I reply that she may fly away to eat and see her family but that he’ll probably see other ladybugs again as Spring gets closer.

This satisfies him and he’s off to the swingset, leaving me to the leaves.

I’m recounting this story because although it was such a small moment, it was something I want to remember. I don’t know that years from now, I would have - had I not written it down. As our days and commutes get longer, I’m constantly trying to make the most of my time with the boys – enjoying little things like this.

So Boogies the Ladybug, wherever you are…Cheers.

Buckethead!

2009-03-06T22:07:00.000-05:00

Weird little oddity of late - Peter and Vincent enjoy walking around with beach buckets on their heads. For like a long time.

This activity is typically accompanied by the chant, "Buuucket. Heeeaaad. Buuucket. Heeaddd."

They even have different sized buckets for their individual noggins. Although, if they take after their father, they're both gonna need an XXL before long. And they're possessive about it. If Vincent takes Peter's bucket, he'll be met with a, "MY BUCKET HEAD! MY BUCKETHEAAAD!"

Is this activity a product of winter's stronghold on the mid-Atlantic?

Most assuredly so.

It's still awesome, though.

Buddies and Puppies

2009-03-04T21:49:00.005-05:00

Recently, the boys had a great visit from their cousin John (along with their cousins Joe & Rachel). John is about 8 months younger than Pete, so it was interesting to see how they interacted. There was certainly a lot of jealousy on Pete's part, (WHO THE HELL ARE YOU TO PLAY WITH MY TOYS, DUDE?!) but the two learned to hang out in peace over the course of a weekend.

Nearly as fun as John was his pet Jack Russell, Meadow. Vincent and Peter dug having the little rascal around, hopping onto their laps, licking their faces, acting as a punching bag. I know, it sounds worse than it was. Pete liked Meadow SO MUCH that he just had to bop her a few times.

No harm done. We hope they come back!

Answer Key

2009-03-01T11:55:00.002-05:00

Pencils down. You've all had ample time. Your answers are below.

1. Crucifix in socket - b. Peter.
2. Nerds distribution - d. both a & b
3. Elevator escape - d. Vincent
4. Hurling crackers - b. Peter
5. Farting & laughing - a. Peter
6. Fountain - b. Vincent
7. Drywall excavation - d. Peter
8. Sleeping - d. Vincent

How'd you do? Interesting that many of you thought the list belonged solely to Pete. That doesn't say much for how I've painted him here. Poor Pete.

Discuss.

Take the Chachi Week of Excitement Quiz

2009-02-20T20:28:00.008-05:00

It’s easy! Just answer each question below correctly and you could win…erm…something awesome! Just match the child with the action that occurred this week. Answers will be revealed in several days, or whenever I think we’ve got enough entries. Let’s go, friends! I’ve included several other kids’ names just to keep it interesting.

1.) This week, this child, in a manner of 2 seconds, removed his nightlight and stuck a small rosary crucifix into the electrical socket, rendering his mother jelly-legged but otherwise, remaining completely unscathed:

a. Vincent

b. Peter

c. Reggie
d. Lionel

2.) This week, this child opened a box of Nerds™ acquired on Valentine’s Day and quickly dispersed them throughout the entire lower level of our house:
a. Vincent
b. Peter
c. Sven
d. Both a & b

3.) This week, this child hopped into an elevator at Longwood Gardens and immediately closed the door, going down, then back up by himself until weeping and terrified, he was rescued by a Longwood Gardens employee who waited with him until his grandfather and brother arrived after going down then up themselves in Abbott & Costello-like fashion:
a. Emmet
b. Joe
c. Peter
d. Vincent

4.) This week, this child hurled a bowl filled with delicious rice crackers (Soy sauce, flax and sesame flavored. Seriously badass. Trader Joe’s. We dip them in hummus.) onto the family room floor while laughing hysterically.
a. Caroline
b. Peter
c. Carmela
d. Vincent

5.) This week, this child farted deeply then laughed heartily, which was awesome:
a. Peter
b. John
c. Walter
d. Vincent

6.) This week, this child jumped into an indoor fountain (shallow) at Longwood Gardens. In his clothes. And shoes.
a. Stanley
b. Vincent
c. Peter
d. All of the above

7.) This week, this child peeled a 6" x 2" section of painted drywall off of a stair kick while no one was looking.

a. Roger

b. Vincent

c. Kevin Regan

d. Peter

8.) This week, this child slept the entire night in his own bed, only waking up once.
a. Tatayana
b. Luther
c. Peter
d. Vincent
*I had to put one good boy thing in here. I mean, everyone’s still fine. It was just kind of a crazy week.

There you have it, readers. Get yer answers ready. Rose and I are gonna go drink a lot of wine.

Ahh Technology

2009-02-17T22:54:00.006-05:00

Recently I became the last 31 year old, moderately web savvy blogger in the United States to join Facebook. When I found out that Mom-Mom had a profile, I realized that it was time.

So it’s been a couple of weeks of showing off photos of the boys, finding out what people I went to grade school look like now, updating people when I drink coffee, and fending off the relentless photo tags. I mean, I’ve tried to forget 7th and 8th grade. Please don’t force them back upon me with your suddenly massive photo collection.

I have to admit that it’s been kind of fun (read: obsessive) but I have a feeling that I’m in the honeymoon stage. I’ve heard several FB vets allude to the fact that they’re “done with it” for various reasons. Can’t say I’m there yet but I wonder how long it will take.

That said, I’ve started to think about my sons growing up in this new world. One where there’s no disconnect between the stages of your life. With things like Facebook and quite simply, the internet in general, they’ll be able to keep all of their distinct sets of friends at their fingertips for as long as they choose. Our generation didn’t have that. At the end of 8th grade, if you were going to a different high school, it was, “Peace man. I’ll see you at the bars the night before Thanksgiving in 8 years.”

Now, the kids that were your friends when you’re eight could potentially be joining you at the bars. Could know when you become a parent almost the instant it happens. They’ll know the precise moment you’re hungry for a granola bar or when you “just can’t deal with Mondays.”

You simply won’t lose touch. Is that good or bad? Does life have a way of filtering through your friendship network? And how young will kids start getting into Facebook? I can see the status updates now…

“Just finished Green Eggs & Ham. Was awesome.”

“Nothing like that fresh diaper feeling…”

“When will Mom stop trying to wipe my boogies!!! Aaaaah!”

“Dude…Ricky just could not get those macaronis to stick to the paper in art class. Did you see him!?”

“…is being made to go to bed! Backyardigans isn’t over!”

“…is going to Chuckie Cheese!!”

So until I get sick of it, I’m going to stick this thing out. Let’s see how many “friends” I can accumulate. Let’s hope I’m done with this by the time Vincent has his own profile.

Photo of the Moment

2009-02-14T09:02:00.003-05:00

Don't look now but they've become buddies.